It’s nearing the end of January already and many New Year’s resolutions have either not yet been started, or they’ve been abandoned. Back in my pessimistic days I’d find myself irritated by those who succeeded with their goals, when I didn’t. Then I’d often come up with reasons (excuses) why it wasn’t the right time, or what got in the way.

It surprises people when they find out, I wasn’t a natural optimist.  Growing up, it would bug me every time my Mom would say “can’t you get that chip off your shoulder?” It would just infuriate me.

When I began to realize that life seemed easier for happy optimistic people, I wondered if I could become one, but I felt conflicted because I didn’t like happy optimistic people, yet at the same time I wished I was one.

Now, decades later, I’ve come to see that changing my thought patterns, my mind, and my attitude were some of the hardest changes I’ve ever made. I’ve made countless changes, and there are still more ahead I’m sure, but those intangible changes like “change your thoughts,” those were the hardest!

When we want to change something outside of our head, where we can see tangible results, it’s easier than trying to change the intangible such as our habitual thoughts.

Here’s my secret Kaizen recipe for making lasting changes:

1. Work on one intangible change while you work on one tangible change – Many experts say you can only focus on one thing at a time to get real results, but I’ve found by working on one tangible and one intangible, I get better results. Example: Tangible – get in better shape by going to the gym five or six days a week. Intangible- become more positive.  What begins to happen is, you see progress in the tangible goal, and you begin to realize that the change must be happening to the intangible, if you’re putting the same amount of daily energy into it. It’s like building Faith, you won’t see it or feel it building, but by making those daily deposits, it is happening. You’ll see it eventually, but it helps if you’re improving your golf swing, your ballet, your yoga, your diet, or your savings account – something tangible at the same time where you can see the improvements taking place.

2. Break the goal down into doable increments – If you’ve got a big wide goal like “become positive” or “get in my best shape yet”, you’ll need to break it down into bite size pieces. This may take some time for you to customize a solution. For those who want to get in shape, I love the book The%20Perfect%20Power%20Within%20You” target=”_blank”>The Perfect Power Within You it’s a 7 week course, but gives you an idea of how to change a thought into a more positive one, and how to see things differently. It gives you a thought for each day to work on throughout the day. Once you’ve come up with some ideas on how to break your goal down into doable increments, you’ll need #3 and # 4.

3. Small Continuous Improvement (Kaizen) – Rather than looking for massive improvement such as “I’m going to mediate one hour in the morning, 30 minutes in the afternoon and one hour in the evening every day and I’ll live mindfulness by next week.” Go for small continuous improvement. Choose a version that you can commit to on a regular basis that’s small enough that it won’t drain you and you won’t quit. Consistency is a huge factor for making real and lasting change. Once you’ve chosen your tangible and intangible goal/desire, create an action plan for how you will incorporate it into your life (daily, or Monday, Wednesday, Friday). Then create a way to record your actions and hold yourself accountable. This could mean a daily goal journal that you record your actions in for 10 minutes in the evening, or maybe you found an app for your phone (they have so many), or it’s a nightly check-in with your goal partner.

4. Tweak and refine – No, you’re not done yet. Once you’ve created an action plan and a tracking plan/accountability plan you will set forth and try it out. As the days and weeks progress you’ll notice if your plan is working for you or not. So tweak and refine: if you realize that your plan isn’t working you make appropriate changes. Maybe you’ll need to change the time of day, time allotment from 60 minutes to 30 minutes, maybe you’ll start using a timer, or setting an alarm to help you stay on track.

5. Celebrate the actions you took – Some results we can’t control, but we can control the actions. We must take a moment to celebrate the controllable things we did right. If you put in the time, and executed your action plan, recorded your actions then celebrate. Maybe the results you hoped for weren’t quite within reason and maybe it’s time to adjust the desired results. On the road to becoming more optimistic, I learned to be okay when I fell off track because of bad news, a bad situation, or a random act of negative thinking. It didn’t mean I wasn’t making progress. The more we acknowledge our successes, (such as executing our action plan, taking constant action, etc…) the more energized and inspired we’ll be to keep going. If we don’t celebrate our successes we’re more likely to give up.

6. Take your eyes off of results – This is contrary to a lot of advice I was given in goal setting, and in life. But I’ve found it to be incredible. When I take my eyes off of the results, and put my attention on the purpose and the process I find I have more enthusiasm and vigor to stay the course. It fuels my motivation, and I tend not to think “how far way I am”, or the “what ifs” or the “ya but…” rather than going down that path of resistance and fear, I see the image of what I desire, and I feel it. This connects me to an incredible power that seems to open doors and things happen. Connect to the purpose of your desire/goal and connect to the process of putting in the action steps you can control. You’re making deposits into its reality.

So, what does it take to make lasting change? It takes personal kaizen: Small continuous improvements, where you focus on the whole, and give it daily attention. 

Making real and lasting change takes commitment. The more you tweak and refine your process, so it’s doable, efficient and effective, and fits in well with your daily life, you’ll find that over time that desired change becomes habitual.

Layer in your changes, don’t try to do too much at once, or you won’t be able to commit to it, and that leads to failure.

Whatever change you want to make, you can do it!

Over the years I have changed many things about myself, and I’ll admit change isn’t easy, and sometimes we stumble and fall off course. If you have aspects of your life you really, really want to change perhaps personal kaizen can help. Some of things I’ve changed in my own life include:

• My thought patterns
• Mindset
• Attitude
• Spending habits & saving habits
• Body shape and weight
• Went from not being able to touch my toes to fantastic flexibility (took a few years)
• Food cravings (still working on coffee, but almost there!)
• Diet
• Ability to write as a dyslexic (improved writing ability)
• Broke through limited thinking
• Changed how I see myself and my life
• Learned to move through fear
• Learned discipline
• Went from shy and socially awkward to enjoying social situations
• Learned how I learn, and learned to learn (had many challenges in this area)
• Move through and past resistance
• From being sedentary to loving fitness and exercise

What aspects of your life have you changed that you’re most proud of? What aspects do you desire to change? Any suggestions you have for making lasting change?

Please share your thoughts by adding your comment.

How to Make Lasting Changes in Your Life originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on January 23, 2012.
http://www.kaizenvision.com

Typically I have a lot of fun giving gifts, but sometimes it’s a hairsplitting challenge to find something non-generic, unique and something the special person would like.

I have a handful of people who I find really hard to find gift ideas for, and even though Christmas and Holidays aren’t about gifts and material possessions, it can be great fun to give something that makes the person smile, laugh or do something they just wouldn’t ordinarily do.

If you’re looking for some ideas for a unique gift for your friend, family member, or your favorite hairdresser I’ve got a few ideas you may like.

I’ve compiled a short list of unique gift ideas that I love, and would like to share with you

1) An Intuitive Reading – A gift certificate for an intuitive reading (or physic reading) is a wonderfully unique gift! My first reading was a gift, and I probably wouldn’t have done it otherwise. I’ve had a couple of readings from Angela (www.PoweredbyIntuition.com) and she’s fantastic. She gave me a reading over the phone; we didn’t have to meet in person, and it was a spot on reading. It even gave me clarity about the direction of my dreams and helped me shape my vision. Now yours may be different, but what an awesome gift!

2) A Pottery Class – There’s a local place here called, Color Me Mine , and you can customize a piece of pottery such as a mug, a plate, a vase etc…. it’s quite fun to go with a friend and create your own custom piece of pottery. I’m not particularly talented in this area, but I still managed to create a fun unique mug. It’s really a fun experience, even for those who aren’t “good” at that stuff.

3) Gift Certificate for a Theme Park or Other Experience – One year a friend gave me the gift of Disneyland. Theme parks can be quite expensive, but there are other local events that you might be able to give as a gift.

4) Tickets to a Play, Symphony or Other type of Performance – goldstar.com is a website where you can buy discounted tickets to local performances and events. So many great shows happen in small towns and big cities. It can be a great treat to send someone to a show that they wouldn’t ordinarily see. You may need to give a gift certificate if you don’t want to buy a ticket for a particular day and not sure of their calendar/availability. **Not all gifts need to be surprises

5)  Music to Promote Sleep – Perfect for the insomniac in your life. This collection of music might only be available on mp3 these days. I have the CD from years ago and listened to it every night for 4 years. It worked so well! One day G requested something different so I’ve recently tried music to inspire positive thinking, I like that one too. If you give an mps gift, you can download it and put it on a CD so you have something to wrap and give, or you can print the image of it and give them their access information.

6) A Makeover – How Fun!! Typically this is for ladies; there’s a local place I love called Sephora. They may be nationwide now, I’m not sure. You can go in and have a partial makeover such as “just show me how to create smoky eyes” or “help me figure out how to use eyes shadow” or “show me how to use sparkles and glitter New Years” or you can have a total facial make over, and learn what colors work for you etc… It can be a lot of fun, and if you don’t buy a ton of makeup while you’re there, it’s a wonderfully affordable gift!

7) Handmade Gift Certificate – You can get creative with this one. Create a gift certificate for one night of babysitting, one fabulous dinner during the month of January, or one afternoon picnic etc… Be sure to let the person know you’re serious and follow up to ensure they book a date and use the certificate.

8) Loose Leaf Tea with a Tea Press – One of the things that’s been helping me “quit” coffee has been the introduction to yummy loose leaf tea, which is different than what’s in a tea bag at the grocery store. I’ve learned that tea bags have tea dust rather than the full leaf which means the flavor isn’t there. After having “real” tea, I’ve been able to drink much, much more tea and my coffee consumption is down to a few cups in a month (on a bad week it might be a few in a week) but it’s been a tremendous help! There’s a local place here that sells their tea online, The Tea Gardens, or you can buy great loose leaf tea at whole foods or other local places. If you don’t know what a tea press is, here’s a link to see what tea presses are.

9) Give the Gift of Your Favorite Digital Product - You can give the gift of one of your favorite online digital products. Just print the image and give them their user name and password, and you can wrap it up as a gift they can open. One of the ones that I really like is Farnoosh’s 10 Minute Daily Invigorator for natural energy 

10) Give a Donation to the Charity of Their Choice - It’s wonderful to give a charitable donation on someones behalf, to make a contribution to their favorite charity. Here’s an article I wrote about researching a charity to be sure that the ones you choose to give to are ones that maximize their donations rather than mismanage their funds. “Tis the Season of Giving. Are Your Charities Doing Their Part? It can be a great gift to donate, and it’s even better when we feel good about knowing that charity is doing a great job at managing the donated funds.

11) Electronic Toothbrush – This was one of the most unusual gifts I’ve received, and it took me a couple of weeks to get use to using it, but after the learning curve and getting adjusted to it, I loved it! My teeth feel super clean and I actually don’t like to use a traditional tooth anymore, which I do when traveling, and boy I miss my electronic one. They are rather pricey, but the replacement brushes are affordable, so it’s not expensive to maintain and keep using it.

12) Fleece Sheets - This can be awkward gift to give, I know, but fleece sheets are divine during winter and far too many people don’t know about them. ** I do not recommend the plush or mircoplush. They feel soft, but they don’t breathe so it gets sweaty, which is icky. The Fleece is the way to go. the fabric breathes, it’s warm, fuzzy and just wonderful. Be sure to read the label and get the Fleece! I get them at Ross, Marshalls and TJmax, but you can also get them on Amazon and overstock.com You give the gift of warmth and snuggle heaven with this gift idea.

I know the typical list is 10, and well 12 is a rather odd number, but I why take out a neat idea?

I do recommend giving gifts with a return gift receipt when you’re taking a risk like an electric tooth brush or fleeces sheets etc… It’s a way to have fun giving something unique and giving them the option of doing what they want to do with it.

For gifts such as a unique experience, well I like to really encourage the person to try it. Unless of course it’s a life threatening experience, personally I wouldn’t jump out of plane or bungee, but I’d go see a symphony or a show that I typically wouldn’t see.

Have fun with this list, get creative and see what happens when you go unique with gift giving!

Wishing you a most magical and memorable Christmas and Holiday Season!!

I’d love to hear about some of your favorite unique gift ideas, ones you like to give, ones you were happy to receive! Fun gifts, funny gifts, fabulous gifts, unique gifts…. please tell!

Please share your thoughts by adding your comment.

Unique Gift Ideas From Fun, to Funny, to Fabulous! originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on December 19, 2011.
http://www.kaizenvision.com

“Not only is your story worth telling, but it can be told in words so painstakingly eloquent that it becomes a song.”
-Gloria Naylor

It’s nearing the end of 2011, and for many of us, it’s a time of reflection. Reflect upon this passing year, looking towards the upcoming year, 2012, and thinking of any resolutions or goals we desire.

It’s mental cleaning time.

Sweep the floors of your mind, dust the corners, and re-arrange.

But, before you simply ponder your successes, and non-successes, and evaluate what you want in life, just stop.

Stop for a moment, or longer, and listen to your life story.

When’s the last time you heard yourself tell your life story?

Most of us don’t pay much attention to our life story, yet it affects the way we perceive our life, what we expect… it affects how we go about achieving our dreams, or how we let them go.

Many of us aren’t truly aware of what we believe about ourselves. Yet, how we see ourselves largely determines our outcome in life. So, it’s pretty important to get really clear about whether we see ourselves as a Lion, or a Mouse, in this life.

The Benefits of Listening to Your Life Story

1. Clarity and Insight - When we listen to our own personal life story, we can get really clear about how we actually see ourselves.  We’ll see if we’re headed for unstoppable self-empowerment, or headed toward defeat.

2. Road-map for change – After you listen to your life story, you’ll have a better idea of how on track you are and how off you might be, You can begin to put together a road map of small steps toward the life you desire. The roadmap will tell you what you need to fix or adjust. It will show you where you are in relation to where you want to be, and it will tell you what might stand in your way, based on your internal point of view.  Your life story will show you what your obstacles tend to be, what your patterns are, and it will give you the self-knowledge you need to create a path for yourself.

Prepare

The process may take an hour, or several hours, so whatever time you’ve got, make a decision to book an appointment with yourself, and tell yourself your life story. OR, even better, tell a friend and listen to theirs. You may want to record it on a digital recorder, you may want to jot notes, but LISTEN.

Keep these questions in mind as you recall your life story:

• Is your story self-empowering, or is it a sad story of someone who was a victim to someone or some circumstance?
• What are the overarching themes?
• Does your story focus more on the things you found joy in, or the things you found pain in?
• Does your story share your successes –  the little ones, the medium ones, and the big ones? Or does it share mostly failures and things that didn’t work out?
• As you tell your story do you feel sad, or do you feel inspired and strong?

Be honest when telling your story, and be honest when looking at your overall themes.  If you have dreams you want to live, you’ll want to clean your mindset before you continue your journey.  If your attitude is filled with fear, limitations, and thoughts of it not working out, then you’re setting yourself up for defeat.

By listening to yourself tell (or write) your life story, you’ll gain insight into what your actual point of view is. You’ll notice that your story has overarching themes and patterns.

Guideline for Recalling Your Life Story

Take the time to do melt into this exercise, and go back as far as you can remember.

1)  In your mind, go to the day you were born. Start here. You might describe the family you were born into, or whatever you can think of.

2)  Go through each year. You may have no memories prior to pre-school or kindergarten, but take yourself there. It may be best to lie on the ground and close your eyes as you walk yourself through each and every year of your life.

3)  Pay attention to the emotions you feel as you go through each year, and look for memories that stand out the most.

4)  Can you describe your personality?

5)  Can you describe how you felt about situations?

6)  Can you describe your relationship with your family members?

7)  Can you describe friendships?

8)  What were your thoughts of school and home?

9)  What were some of the best things that happened, blessings, things you’re grateful for?

10) What were your dreams, goals, desires?

11)  What were your fears and stresses?

12)  Walk through elementary school, high school, college, walk through your 20′s, your 30′s your 40′s etc… What memories stand out the most?

13)  Notice emotional patterns?

14)   Notice themes?

15)   Notice life patterns (such as making friends easily, or hard to make friends or patterns of success or defeat)

• Did you find yourself discovering turning-point moments where you changed your life, changed your life direction, changed your mindset?
• Did you discover an overarching theme of failure, defeat, hurt, neglect or any other reflection of low self-esteem, negative self-belief, which causes patterns of self-sabotage that you didn’t realize?
• Did you discover that you’re living what you once only dreamed of?
• Did you awaken self-empowerment?
• Did you get crystal clear on what you want to change about yourself, or celebrate the changes you’ve made?

If you don’t like how you see your life story, or you don’t like the themes and patterns; you can change it!

If we take the time to discipline our mind, and keep our thoughts empowered we set ourselves up for success.

It’s a perfect time of year to see how far we’ve come, or see if we got stuck along the way, and re-route ourselves in the direction of our dreams.

Motivation likes to be fed with successes and wins. The more we journey toward our dreams and the more we see it blossoming the stronger our motivation grows. The opposite works too, when we don’t see success or progress we may feel like giving up and being defeated.

Do yourself a wonderful favor, and listen to your life story. Identify your life patterns. See what you need to change within your mind and your habits. See what you have changed and what you’ve accomplished and celebrate your successes, all of them, the big ones and the tiny ones.

When’s the last time you listened to your story?

Have you been able to re-write or re-frame your story, if so has it helped you?

Please share your thoughts by adding your comment.

Listen and Reflect. Your Story Has Secrets and Wisdom to Share originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on December 12, 2011.
http://www.kaizenvision.com

Adversity causes some men to break; others to break records.

- William Arthur Ward

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving Day here in the U.S and it can be a wonderful time of celebrating with family and friends. It can also be a lonely and depressed time, which can intensify when it looks like everyone else, has so much to be thankful for.

For those who are in a time of personal struggle, it can feel ridiculous to think that gratitude or joy is a choice, but it is.

The truth is, no matter what your situation, you always have a choice in how you choose to perceive your reality.

Dig deep within your heart and soul, you’ll find your inner champion who wants to fiercely kick into gear! That inner champion is the part of you that doesn’t want to feel bad; it wants you to win at life.

On any given day, you can make the decision to let your inner champion win, or you can allow defeat to be a reality.

It doesn’t matter what your age is. It doesn’t matter what you decided in the past. On any day, even today, you can make a choice to wake up your inner champion and kick defeat.

“Adversity is the state in which man most easily becomes acquainted with himself….”
- John Wooden

The Real Life Value of Gratitude

When a person connects with a deep feeling of gratitude, things change. I have experienced this and experimented with it countless times enough to know how profoundly it works.

Connecting to gratitude can transform relationships, it can give you energy and strength, it can give you the creative ideas that you need to change your situation, it can relieve stress and pressure, it can actually change your life.

There are deliberate actions you can take to fuel your inner champion and awaken a real sense of gratitude regardless of what you’re experiencing

How to Trigger Gratitude

1. Physical activity – It’s incredible how much physical activity frees our thoughts and emotions. We can get mentally unstuck. Typically we feel better when we move our bodies so take a walk, swim, get on a bike, jump rope, dance around – just get your body into motion

2. Breathe deeply – Take a long slow inhale as much as you can and breathe in the words “so grateful” and on a long slow exhale breathe out the words “peace.” The more resistant you are to this (meaning you’re really stressed out or deeply hurting), the longer you’ll need to do it before it works. If this feels wildly far away from reality, then do this for 10 minutes (it’s a long time I know)! If you’re feeling just a little ungrateful you may only need 3 minutes.

3. Watch your words! - When we feel stuck and frustrated or down, we tend to use strong words that reinforce our negative emotions. These strong words also reinforce how we perceive our reality. It’s imperative that you rephrase your words. Example: “ I hate Thanksgiving, I have nothing and no one” Rephrase your words, “Maybe I’ll see if there’s a place or food shelter, I can volunteer this Thanksgiving. I’d like to make this year’s Holiday special” Don’t use phrases such as “I never had…” “I’ll never have…” Words are powerful, they affect how we feel, and how we feel affects how we see reality, that affects whether or not we’ll have inspired creative solution ideas, and that affects whether or not our lives will change.

4. Watch your emotions -  When we’re anything other than happy, joyous or peaceful, we’re more likely to be in a negative emotion of fear, stress, and emotional pain. New empowering ideas typically come out of a positive emotion. If you can’t get happy, at least fight for reaching neutral.

5. Write – Write down everything that you can feel grateful for, take a close look around you and give some deep quality attention, really take it in.

6. Contemplate – Think of any and all of your past successes, think of things you’ve done well, think of things you can be proud of – feel the gratitude

7. Choose – Make the deliberate choice to feel grateful

Take a different look at your challenges

Because of difficult times – you have the opportunity to use your strength, your courage, your mind to explore solutions and experience your potential

Because of your mistakes – you’ve learned valuable lessons, and you may now be even closer to success

Because of your challenges – you can grow and evolve into more than you were. This deepens your life experience and awakens that champion within you. If you knew you were born for more, then now you get to create it for yourself.

If your fears got the best of you in the past – you now have the opportunity to be courageous and brave. Your window of opportunity may feel like fear, but each time you get a chance to win

If you’re disappointed in how life seems to have turned out – it’s not over until you’re dead. You’ve got the gift of time. You’ve got the gift of mind and intelligence. You’ve got more gifts than you realize, and they will show themselves as you push yourself forward.

If your heart is broken by a lover, a friend, life in general – you can grieve the loss, but don’t take too long before you take a fresh new look. There are opportunities even if you can’t see them yet, they are there. You’ve been released. It will feel good to pick yourself up and travel on a new road.

If you’re exhausted – it means you dug in deep, found your grit and made real effort. You left no stone unturned. You didn’t fail to fight. You make your inner champion proud.

If you’re financially hurting – pay your bills with love. I know this may sound crazy but it works. “I am so, so grateful I have enough money to pay this bill, and write this check. I love and bless this check; I send it with love and gratitude.”

If you can’t see joy or find gratitude look a little deeper

Mind - Ideas start in the mind before we can take action and implement them. Your mind can create new opportunities, and it can be used to empower you to new heights.

Time - Although it often feels there’s never enough, time is a blessing. We get 24 hours each and every day.

Sky – Reminds us of the infinite, life is so much bigger than us.

Sun – Gives such beautiful light to our day

Sunrise – Hold the promise of a new day, a new chance to begin again

Sunset – Gives us an invitation to reflect on the day, and reshape our actions and attitude

Moon – Glistens in the sky, reminding us that world has incredible beauty, and life is cyclical.

If you have a job, there’s much to be grateful for!

If you have a home, a place to live, there’s much to be grateful for!

If you have family and friends who love you, there’s much to be grateful for!

To be alive, means you have the chance to experience wonderment. All things are possible, and your open heart, open mind, and your gratitude will guide you.

Regardless of your situation, there are always ways to tap into gratitude. Being thankful, feeling a deep appreciation can create miracles. It can open doors, create new thoughts, and guide us to amazing life experience.

Adversity can make us incredibly compassionate people; it can transform us, so we may be of real help to others.

Please share, what are you grateful for? What do you do when you wan to feel grateful?

Please share your thoughts by adding your comment.

Finding Gratitude – How to be Thankful in Difficult Times originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on November 23, 2011.
http://www.kaizenvision.com

“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.”
- Anne Bradstreet

It’s winter here in the U.S and yes, Southern California does have a winter season. While it may not reach below zero temperatures where I live, it does get cold and it does get dark early. So I like finding things that make winter yummy and lovable.

I have a winter joy list, the things that help me embrace winter and celebrate it with joy. I share my secrets, so they may give you more ways to embrace the cold and have fun in the process.

In the spirit of personal kaizen, here are 10 small things to make winter wonderful. 

1. Fleece Sheets– I’m surprised how many people don’t know about this amazing treat! I can’t imagine ever going back to the flannel sheet, Jersey sheet, or cotton in the cold winter. Fleece sheets are the ultimate comfort! Warning: You may sleep in and not want to get up in the morning.

2. Peppermint Green Tea – At Trader Joe’s grocery it’s called Candy Cane Tea. It has a warm wintery taste, and makes me feel like its Holiday season.

3. Slipper Collection – Yes a collection: red fuzzy slippers, bunny slippers with cute ears, slipper boots, and thick fuzzy socks in fun crazy colors. It’s pretty interesting how fun comfy footwear can change a mood. After a not so fabulous day, those polka dot thick fuzzy slipper socks make everything good again.

4. Hot Apple Cider – Sometimes I add cinnamon to the hot cider. It’s not something I drink during the rest of the year, so it feels wonderfully festive in November, December and January.

5. Hot Chocolate – Yummy hot chocolate. I usually make it with milk and not hot water.  My favorite hot chocolate mixes are Ghirardelli’s double chocolate, Ghirardelli’s chocolate hazelnut, and Godiva’s dark hot chocolate. Adding peppermint or cinnamon can be nice too. Warning: It’s not a low-calorie, or low sugar beverage

6. Autumn Colored Candles – When it gets closer to December, I’ll change out my autumn color candles for the silver ones. But fall colors create such a feeling of warmth.

7. Layer up and go to the beach – Breathe in the crisp air, and hear the sound of the birds and the ocean waves. There’s almost no one there in the winter, so it’s easy to look at the great big ocean, look all around and see just how magnificent it is. It’s peaceful, and easy to feel completely at one with nature and the Divine.

8.  Decorate – Break out autumn and winter colors. I like to add reds, amber, and silver, throughout the home. It could be in the form of pillows, blankets, candle holders, a table runner, or an area rug. Pick your favorite winter colors and celebrate the season.

9.  Fun Rain Boots – Here rains in the winter and in order to make it fun, I bought a pair of rain boots that make it enticing to splash in a puddle.

10. Lamps – Orange, red, amber lamp shades work wonders. With regular ceiling lighting, it can feel harsh or too bright, and colorful lamps, and lighting can be a wonderful solution. You can either get a few small lamps for ambiance, or have some different color light bulbs, or just use different color lamp shades. One of my lamps has a yellow light bulb (it’s an amber/red shade) it makes for great ambient light. Lighting and color effects a person’s mood and emotions, so it’s a great time to see what you love.

I’d love to hear about your favorite ways to celebrate winter.

What’s on your winter joy list?

Please share your thoughts by adding your comment.

Winter Joy List. 10 Small Things To Make Winter Wonderful originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on November 11, 2011.
http://www.kaizenvision.com

Welcome back to episode 5 of the Smart, Opinionated and Fabulous podcast!

Today we delve deeply into how negative thoughts can physically affect our body, how the world around us contributes to our cycle of negative thinking, why we must break through negative thinking for our well-being, and we review some tools to empower us towards positive thinking.

Many people feel that they can’t be positive, because of their life situation. We look at how we need to change the perspective in order for us to have real change. We also talk about tools and techniques to break through limiting beliefs and begin to feel good now.

No matter where we are in life, and what’s happening around us we all deserve to experience personal well-being, and there really are things we can to do elevate our spirit, our emotions, our perspective. In today’s show, we explore the art of living with the power of positivity, and getting our mindset to help us rather than hold us back. 

Show Notes:

1. The physical effect of negative thoughts – How negative thoughts can physically affect our physical body and actually weigh us down. We share moments when we personally experienced this happening.

2. Bridging the gap – Sometimes our reality seems so bleak, positive thinking feels like a lie. We look at bridging the gap  between affirmations, vision boards, positive thinking and reality. We talk about fow to make the choice to be open and positive regardless of what you are experiencing in the moment.

3. The wrong way to go about positive thinking -  We talk about effective ways to go about positive thinking and affirmations, so they actually work and benefit us.

4. Positive empowered thinking a lifetime study – Why positive thinking and empowering your mind is a lifetime practice.

5. Turning things around - Ways to empower yourself and enable yourself to turn things around when you slip into negative thinking.

Highlights and References mentioned in the Podcast:

1. Creating Affirmations that work
2. Our friend and amazing resource, Melody Fletcher.
3.  I’ve probably talked about this lady over a million times. She’s been an incredibly strong influence on me since the early 1990′s, Louise L Hay. Below are a couple of links to videos of her, the first one is the one I mention in the podcast.

In this video Louise Hay talks about how at age 80, she’s still learning. It reminds that we may not master this in a year or two, rather we make it a part of our daily living. Click this link to see the short fabulous video:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSjAg28-Zdw&NR=1

Have you worked with vision boards? If so, have you found it to be effective in opening your mind and aligning you with inspired action? 

What do you to go past fear based thinking, negative thinking and empower your thoughts? 

We love hearing your thoughts and comments. Feel free to leave your comment below or contact us at softalkpodcst[at]gmail[dot]com

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Using Vision Boards and Affirmations to Break the Cycle of Negative Thinking originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on November 2, 2011.
http://www.kaizenvision.com

Are you too nice?  Being too nice to others often means we’re not being nice to ourselves. It can lead to us to feeling like a doormat, and resenting others.

I’ll never forget how angry I felt when a well-known acting teacher I had for class at  NYU said to me, “people tend to walk on you when you tend to lie down” I felt angry, mortified, embarrassed. I begged the department to leave that class and move into another one. This teacher would have me run and get him water or coffee during class, he’d have me doing the lights and tech, and when it was my turn for my scene work, he’d say ‘oh we’re out of time. Sorry Eileen.” (He wouldn’t even pronounce my name correctly). I wanted to cry, felt like I was being such a good student, and yet I wasn’t being treated like the other students. I was too nice, and I lost out on the class work. Eventually I found the courage to stand up to him and say “no, someone else can get your coffee and run the lights. It’s my turn to work on my scene work with you.”

Have you ever wanted to say ‘no’, but said ‘yes’ anyway? Maybe it was out of guilt, or obligation, or just an old habit of being too nice.

While saying ‘no’  is something that comes easily to some, it’s something that others need to practice, and learn to become more assertive. It’s not strange that those who have a habit of saying yes, when they don’t want to, also have a hard time getting “yes” out of others. Not to fear, this is something you can change.

In this episode, we talk how you can say ‘no’ and feel good about it, and how you can get to ‘yes’ on something that you really want. 

Click To Play:    http://www.ProlificLiving.com/podcasts/sof/SmartOpinionatedFabulous_Episode04.mp3

We look at some of the root causes that compel us to say ‘yes’ all the time? We examine reasons that we give up before getting to yes on something that really matters to us?

We explore these topics in a fun and empowering manner. We share our own stories, and give you plenty of strategies to tackle each one in your life.

It’s Episode #4 of the Smart, Opinionated and Fabulous podcast,  Show Notes:

1. How you should learn to set expectations, even with your own family and friends, so that you develop new habits and stay true to yourself.

2. Simple, effective and practical tips that you can put to use right now on how to say no professionally.

3. How to manage that ultimate feeling of guilt when you feel like saying no.

4. The one reason we end up saying yes all the time to our family and friends and even to our bosses, and how to stop it. Why it’s a mistake to say yes all the time in your career.

5. Learning to put boundaries on other people’s expectations, special tips on how to talk to the boss, and the main reason you should not fear getting fired.

6. Our secrets on getting to yes when you get no response or a “maybe” from the person that you are asking for.

7. Resources that we mentioned as an extension to this conversation:

• The power of positive confrontation (book) by Barbara Patcher
• Civilized assertiveness for women (book) by Judith McClure
• Handling verbal confrontation (book) by Robert Jerard
• Getting to Yes (book) by Roger Fischer & William Ury

We’d love to hear your opinions and thoughts about the show

Let us know what topics you want to hear about in upcoming episodes. Please leave a comment or email us at softalkpodcast[a]gmail[dot]com, and share the word on the podcast if you enjoyed listening!

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How to Stop Being Too Nice. Saying No, When You Want to Say No originally appeared on Kaizen Vision on October 19, 2011.
http://www.kaizenvision.com